As for me, all he knew was that my name was Rose Ouyang, that I lived in an apartment a hundred years in the future, that I had no ill intentions but wasn't particularly clever either.
I was just an ordinary woman.
"I'm an orphan. When I was young, my body was very weak. I cherished my life and feared death. I lived cautiously until my heart condition was cured. I never stayed up late or indulged myself, all so I could live to a ripe old age, safe and sound."
I rubbed the dust off my hands and sighed.
Looking back, I didn't seem to have any particular standout qualities. Our mutual attraction was probably born from not truly understanding each other.
"So? Do you think I'm too ordinary? Disappointed..."
He didn't speak for a long time. He seemed very focused on driving, but his knuckles had gone white.
When he heard the last sentence, his mouth finally loosened slightly. "You are certainly not ordinary."
"Isn't this ordinary? I have no family background, not much education, average abilities, no special talents. But you're the Young General—so many girls are fighting to marry you."
He slammed the brakes. I didn't know which words had provoked him this time.
"In my eyes, you know the trajectory of my life, you see through all the developments. You could become an omniscient god, while I am merely... an ant whose ending has already been written."
I turned to look at him, meeting his unflinching gaze.
He looked thinner. I wondered if he hadn't been sleeping well these past few nights.
"Did you read that history book?"
He neither admitted nor denied it.
A suffocating silence filled the car.
But in my heart, everything suddenly became clear as a mirror.
So what if the ending was already written!
I let out a long breath and turned my head forward:
"In my heart, you are a beautiful dream—one that I want to keep dreaming forever. Before, I was a coward who feared death. Your appearance made me reflect on how I should live this life. Victor, I really do like you."
I calmly spoke my heart, and the dust on my hands was finally rubbed clean.
All of this had crystallized in my mind this night—perhaps even earlier, my instincts had already made the choice for me.
When I turned to look at him again, his eyes were slightly wider, his jaw tighter, and a faint sheen of sweat glistened at his temples.
Other than that, there was nothing unusual. He didn't utter a single word of reciprocation.
I thought my confession was heartfelt and sincere. His reaction was truly disappointing.
After a long while, he said, "Rose, you've said you liked me too many times and taken it back too many times. I don't dare believe it anymore."
I thought of how we met—it started with my impulsiveness.
After that, although I always acted like I liked him, I could never commit to staying here.
I pouted. "I love you. I love only you, and I want to be with you forever."
After changing expressions in increasing desperation, I simply started taking off my clothes.
I undid the belt that young Victor had once worn, pulled open the buttons of the jacket he had once worn, revealed the shirt beneath, and began unbuttoning it one by one.
By the third button, Victor finally grabbed my hand.
"What exactly are you trying to do?"
"You don't believe I like you, so I'll... I'll just sleep with you. Then you'll have to believe me!"
His ears flushed red. He found me incomprehensible:
"All you need to say is that you're willing to stay with this ant—this me—for a lifetime. Whether my lifetime is ten years or two..."
"I want to be with you, Young General Victor, for a lifetime. A hundred-year lifetime. I want to be with you—not waste a single minute or second!"
I cut him off and screamed it out.
Perhaps my behavior was too violent. He stared at me for a while, then finally laughed.
He softly said "Okay," accepting my storm-like confession, then started the car and drove on.
We didn't continue the conversation about the history book, but for some reason, I just believed him.
I believed he had already digested everything and must have formed a new plan.
After all, he was Victor.
"Put your clothes back on. Don't catch a cold." While focused on driving, he still remembered to remind me to dress.
I looked down at my half-open clothes and belatedly felt ashamed.
What kind of person says something like "I'll just sleep with you"!
I must have been driven mad.
I buttoned back up, pressing my trembling voice into an imitation of calm:
"Can you promise me one thing?"
"What thing?"
"When you're not busy, when you have nothing to do, can you come home? Let me see you."
He couldn't suppress the smile at the corner of his mouth and agreed again: "Okay."
"One more thing."
"What?"
"Those guards didn't know anything. Don't punish them, lest someone else develops divided loyalties and hurts you."
He gave a soft snort and said nothing more.
Back at the General's Estate, the guards were completely replaced. I heard that each of the previous shift had received five lashes.
The young General said the "enemy" was cunning, so the offense was understandable, and reduced the sentence from twenty lashes to five.
They received their beating and were actually grateful.
I, the "enemy," sat at home eating breakfast, feeling a chill down my spine.
Over the next few days, to accommodate the orphans, he no longer restricted my movements.
By day I was busy and didn't think of Victor.
Only at night, occasionally in my sleep, I would smell a familiar crisp scent and feel that person standing beside my bed.
A fingertip rough with calluses would touch my hair and then immediately withdraw.
By the time I woke, all I could hear was the sound of a car engine in the distance.
When we brought the children to the church, the place was in chaos.
Grace happened to fall ill and needed bed rest. She was worried but lacked the strength. Afraid that her constant concern for the children would keep her from resting and harm her health, I promised I would take full responsibility for them.
Later, when Mrs. Lambertu came to deliver blankets, I learned from her that Grace was pregnant, and the pregnancy was very unstable.
Mrs. Lambertu urged me not to tell anyone: "The eldest Miss didn't want to hide it from you, but she doesn't want to tell her husband or the young master just yet."
She said it was very difficult for Grace to conceive, and they weren't sure if this pregnancy could be carried to term.
With the tense atmosphere after Victor's assassination attempt, both Oliver and Victor were busy. She didn't want to distract them.
My feelings were complicated—happy for her, but also worried. History had no record of her, not even of Victor beyond three brief lines. I could only pray to the statue in the church for Grace's well-being, then continue setting up the space.
At first, the church was empty—nothing at all inside.
The General's Estate had plenty of supplies, but with over a hundred children to care for, it still wasn't enough.
The children didn't mind. They were used to sleeping outdoors. They said being able to rest in an intact church without leaks was already very satisfying.
That night, Mrs. Lambertu gathered all the unused blankets from the General's Estate and brought them over. The older children automatically gave theirs to the younger ones, and those without blankets spread dried grass and laid straw mats on top.
The night of the cold snap was freezing. In the end, I agreed to let them build a fire in the main hall—though it was a significant fire hazard, it was better than letting them freeze.
Fortunately, the General's Estate could supply enough manpower. Within a day or two, the purchasing was mostly done, and after a full week, a spacious fellowship hall had been outfitted with modular beds, covered with clean sheets and blankets.
The main hall used for worship was cleared to serve as a classroom and living area. The original bathrooms and showers had their plumbing renovated for multiple users at once.
Though there was still no kitchen of their own—the General's Estate had to transport cooked meals daily—the children's basic survival needs were met. Seeing their increasingly rounded cheeks and clean little hands filled me with a sense of accomplishment.
I had someone take photos, had them developed urgently, and sent them to Grace, who was on bed rest, so she could rest easy about the pregnancy.